April 6, 2010
The week after our Ski Trip, our friend who worked as the Girl's summer nanny came to visit. So good to see Linsey and her son Vinny. They all went to Sea World and relived Summer 2006 enjoying the shows and laughing like sisters.
The last weekend in March, the Girls and I headed to Tijuana to work on another house building team. This was Maddie's 6th trip and Hannah's 3rd, both of them pounded nails to build walls, Maddie worked on finished up the roofing and helped stucco the building, Hannah always works at twice her size. Volunteer numbers are down but at least 1000 people were in the main camp by Monday evening from all over the US.
Easter Dinner was at our house and it is fun to hear Adult children, Katie and Andy, telling stories about when they were in high school to growing up in our home. I am not sure if Andy had more fun hiding the eggs or Maddie, Hannah and Audrey searching.
"The Cross of Christ is the revealed truth of God's judgment on sin. Never associate the idea of martyrdom with the Cross of Christ. It was the supreme triumph, and it shook the very foundations of hell. There is nothing in time or eternity more absolutely certain and irrefutable than what Jesus Christ accomplished on the Cros-- He made it possible for the entire human race to be brought back into a right-standing relationship with God. He made redemption the foundation of human life; that is, He made a way for every person to have fellowship with God." Oswald Chambers, April 6, My Utmost for His Highest. Kathie looks good and yesterday we meet with the ENT Doctor and he began the process of exams and paperwork to close the stoma or opening leftover from Kathie tracheostomy. She will be in the hospital for two days once the surgery is completed, I will let you know how this progresses. Thank you for the cards and visits to Kathie, your prayers for our strength are appreciated and necessary. She also received a very pretty new night gown.
Sunday night I was able to put my arms around Kathie and enjoy holding her while stroking her hair. I reminded her how beautiful she is.
Dave
MARCH 18, 2010
One of my favorite Oswald Chamber's writtings in My Utmost for His Highest, on March 6, Taking the Next Step... in much patience, in tribulations, in needs, in distresses -2 Corinthians 6:4
"When you have no vision from God, no enthusiasm left in your life, and no one watching and encouraging you, it requires the grace of Almighty God to take the next step in your devotion to Him, in the reading and studying of His Word, in your family life, or in your duty to Him. It takes much more of the grace of God, and a much greater awareness of drawing upon Him, to take that next step, than it does to preach the gospel.
Every Christian must experience the essence of the incarnation by bringing the next step down into flesh-and-blood reality and by working it out with his hands. We lose interest and give up when we have no vision, no encouragement, and no improvement, but only experience our everyday life with its trivial tasks. The thing that really testifies for God and for the people of God in the long run is steady perseverance, even when the work cannot be seen by others. And the only way to live an undefeated life is to live looking to God. Ask God to keep the eyes of your spirit open to the risen Christ, and it will be impossible for drudgery to discourage you. Never allow yourself to think that some tasks are beneath your dignity or too insignificant for you to do, and remind yourself of the example of Christ in John 13:1-17." Passages like this help me to renew my "everyday life" and "live an undefeated life."
Last weekend, Madison, Hannah and I traveled to Park City, UT to visit and ski with my brother Dan and his family. We had a wonderful mini-vacation and enjoyed our time together. We did a similar trip last year and Kathie ended up in the ER with a urinary tract infection the caused her blood pressure to drop very low. This year I enjoyed the fact that she is cared for in a smaller facility and I was confident in her care for the three days I would be away from her. I work to balance our lives and this was a good time of respite for everyone. Monday morning after our return home, Kathie had two doctors appointments and Tuesday she was fitted for a wheelchair (we started the wheelchair process in September). I requested and was granted a referral for Kathie to see an Ear, Nose and Throat Doctor (ENT) to handle the closing of her throat stoma (opening) leftover from her tracheostomy; we have an appointment in early April for evaluation. I am also pursuing a dental appointment for Kathie's loose tooth. By Tuesday afternoon, I was pleased with the progress in Kathie's care, so often no progress is evident to me. My parents visited Kathie on Sunday morning and as my Dad was talking to Kathie, he moved from one side of her wheelchair to another, she followed him with her eyes. We continue to wonder what she sees and hears but find a blessing in moments like this.
"Ask God to keep the eyes of your spirit open to the risen Christ, and it will be impossible for drudgery to discourage you."
Dave
FEBRUARY 27, 2010
Last Saturday morning, I arrived early to see Kathie; a staff member looked surprised but a CNA named Carmen said with a smile, "love doesn't know what time it is." Kathie and I had a good morning together. On Tuesday, an outing was planned for the Balboa Park Museums and I went with the group. I met Kathie and the bus at the Automotive Museum, a family friend volunteers there so he welcomed the group as they made their way around the displays. Last year a new display was unveiled about the old Plank Road between El Centro CA and Yuma AZ. My Grandfather was interviewed and recorded explaining about the wood road over the sand dunes and how my Great-grandfather had run a "stage service" between these two points. Last Thanksgiving my brothers were in town so we all took Grandpa and his great-grandchildren to the museum to listen to his interview. When I called told him that Kathie had now been able to hear the interview he was very happy.
On this type of trip, I learn to care for Kathie outside of the care facility. Pushing the wheelchair around sidewalk holes and up ramps, I really appreciate the time with her. The rest of the day included lunch (where I gave Kath a taste of soda) the sports museum Hall of Champions and the Aerospace Museum. As the bus arrived to transport the group, I had that feeling of someone leaving on a flight from the airport. I stood very close to Kathie and then I gave her a kiss, she sighed and made an exhale noise. Carmen, who was near us said, "I saw that, she loves you too." Yesterday Carmen's daughter had cancer surgery on her throat. I remembered Rosa in my prayers for healing and Carmen for strength. I continue to appreciate that God reminds me to pray outside myself for the many friends who each have their own struggles.
This morning I was early to see Kathie again, as always, I kiss her and tell her, "I love you," but according to Carmen, she already knows how much I love her. Kathie was very comfortable and relaxed as I left our visit.
Blessings,
Dave
FEBRUARY 18, 2010
The Saturday before Valentine's Day, I took Kathie outside in the sunshine and gave her a pedicure, painting her toenails pink. I was glad to be outdoors with her as she wore her floppy hat and sunglasses. We continue to wait for the hole to close from the tracheostomy, the hole is closed each day using Steri-Stripes but the skin and cartilage have not come together yet. We have an appointment in March to meet with her doctor again. Occasionally, she yawns aloud, a sound I enjoy hearing. I also spent time with my arm around her, letting her know how much I love her and yet miss her.
I continue to grow frustrated with my role as a single parent, because I cannot provide the advantages of two parents nor do I have the energy to offer Madison and Hannah, my own inabilities frustrate me. I have gone back in my memory to Kathie's stories as a single parent and continue to pray for strength as I support the Girls. I have learned to pray for other single parents I know in empathy.
Since January, I have been reading and praying Psalm 42, I wonder what my role is for this life. Each project to keep Kathie comfortable seems to become mired in trivial forms and paperwork, my parenting is a struggle, and I am not sure what God wants of me. Psalm 42:9 "I say to God my Rock, Why have you forgotten me?"
Each night I still read Psalms or Streams in the Desert along with My Utmost, from Streams in the Desert February 17: "Dear troubled one, have you been waiting for God to work during long nights and weary days, fearing you have been forgotten? Lift up your head and begin praising Him right now for the deliverance that is on its way to you."
I thank you for your prayers; I recognize that when I want to whine about my life, I have many friends who pray for Kathie daily, our family and my strength. I try though to share honestly about my daily walk and continue to count on God’s renewing strength.
"Hope in God, for I shall yet praise Him, the help of my countenance and my God." Psalm 42:11
Blessings,
Dave
JANUARY 22, 2010
Two of my friends lost their wives to cancer in September, I have shared with them that the time between Halloween and New Years is a difficult emotional time and usually after New Year's Day, I breathe a sigh of relief, but this year the relief did not seem to come. The multiple projects with Kathie's, throat healing, wheelchair design and even a cable television request have all taking much longer than expected. I enjoyed the months of coaching girls' soccer but there are "costs" associated with this wonderful task. Our home repairs and remodeling are in the fourth month and the day-to-day tasks of single parenting have brought me down to an uncomfortable place of waiting and the feeling that I am not catching the tasks that fall through the cracks.
As Hannah's soccer season ended in the last two weeks, I returned to more consistency in my jogging routine. At the top of a small hill on my route is a traffic sign that states, "No Stopping Anytime." I smiled as I read it, I found a traffic sign that speaks to my daily grind and gives me direction. Last week, Madison, Hannah and I sat down to a meal at our dining room table, an event that has become unique rather than the norm. Madison described that dinner to my Mother with such excitement. I will need to refocus my efforts in this area.
Saturday I trimmed and painted Kathie's toenails, when the staff sees this they are reminded that I care about each detail of Kathie and they look closely. We watched her new television, including football games, while holding hands. Sometimes, I stroke her hair, telling her how pretty she is and how much she is missed. This month I purchased some new wrist and elbow braces to go with her knee brace. These braces help loosen contractures and increase joint flexibility. I also continue to work on her mouth muscles trying to help her relearn mouth breathing. Each Monday or Tuesday morning, a massage therapist continues to give her an hour massage, I do not visit that day because she sleeps very soundly afterwards.
Lamentations 3:24-26 NIV I say to myself, "The LORD is my portion; therefore I will wait for him." The LORD is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him; it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the LORD.
I am glad the Lord is my portion; I will continue to wait for His direction,
Dave
JANUARY 8, 2010
Nehemiah 8:10 ...The joy of God is your strength!
After the rush to set up our Christmas Tree, we had a very nice Holiday. Andy spent Christmas Eve at our house and organized the Christmas Brunch when the rest of our family arrived, including omelets made to order.
Madison was very happy for the opportunity to sleep in during the school break. It was very odd for me to watch her drive off to the mall and shop for presents on her own.
Hannah is also one who enjoys sleeping in during her break. Her soccer all-star team participated in a tournament the weekend before Christmas and she has been enjoying her teammates.
I have been coaching Hannah's all-star team and likewise enjoy coaching the young ladies. Between shopping, construction and coaching there were many busy days leading up to Christmas. We continued our "Choose Joy" theme this year by consciously reminding ourselves of the reason for the Holiday. I visited Coronado Hospital before New Years to touch base with staff and patients that we have come to know. When Kathie moved out, I donated some of her old gowns to the Hospital, the young woman who was moved into Kathie's old bed was wearing one of the gowns when I visited, a reminder of disabled friends that spent another Christmas in the hospital. Another woman in her 20's who we befriended was photographed smiling, sounds strange but an amazing blessing to see.
The mall trip with Kathie is still my highlight for December,
Dave
The last weekend in March, the Girls and I headed to Tijuana to work on another house building team. This was Maddie's 6th trip and Hannah's 3rd, both of them pounded nails to build walls, Maddie worked on finished up the roofing and helped stucco the building, Hannah always works at twice her size. Volunteer numbers are down but at least 1000 people were in the main camp by Monday evening from all over the US.
Easter Dinner was at our house and it is fun to hear Adult children, Katie and Andy, telling stories about when they were in high school to growing up in our home. I am not sure if Andy had more fun hiding the eggs or Maddie, Hannah and Audrey searching.
"The Cross of Christ is the revealed truth of God's judgment on sin. Never associate the idea of martyrdom with the Cross of Christ. It was the supreme triumph, and it shook the very foundations of hell. There is nothing in time or eternity more absolutely certain and irrefutable than what Jesus Christ accomplished on the Cros-- He made it possible for the entire human race to be brought back into a right-standing relationship with God. He made redemption the foundation of human life; that is, He made a way for every person to have fellowship with God." Oswald Chambers, April 6, My Utmost for His Highest. Kathie looks good and yesterday we meet with the ENT Doctor and he began the process of exams and paperwork to close the stoma or opening leftover from Kathie tracheostomy. She will be in the hospital for two days once the surgery is completed, I will let you know how this progresses. Thank you for the cards and visits to Kathie, your prayers for our strength are appreciated and necessary. She also received a very pretty new night gown.
Sunday night I was able to put my arms around Kathie and enjoy holding her while stroking her hair. I reminded her how beautiful she is.
Dave
MARCH 18, 2010
One of my favorite Oswald Chamber's writtings in My Utmost for His Highest, on March 6, Taking the Next Step... in much patience, in tribulations, in needs, in distresses -2 Corinthians 6:4
"When you have no vision from God, no enthusiasm left in your life, and no one watching and encouraging you, it requires the grace of Almighty God to take the next step in your devotion to Him, in the reading and studying of His Word, in your family life, or in your duty to Him. It takes much more of the grace of God, and a much greater awareness of drawing upon Him, to take that next step, than it does to preach the gospel.
Every Christian must experience the essence of the incarnation by bringing the next step down into flesh-and-blood reality and by working it out with his hands. We lose interest and give up when we have no vision, no encouragement, and no improvement, but only experience our everyday life with its trivial tasks. The thing that really testifies for God and for the people of God in the long run is steady perseverance, even when the work cannot be seen by others. And the only way to live an undefeated life is to live looking to God. Ask God to keep the eyes of your spirit open to the risen Christ, and it will be impossible for drudgery to discourage you. Never allow yourself to think that some tasks are beneath your dignity or too insignificant for you to do, and remind yourself of the example of Christ in John 13:1-17." Passages like this help me to renew my "everyday life" and "live an undefeated life."
Last weekend, Madison, Hannah and I traveled to Park City, UT to visit and ski with my brother Dan and his family. We had a wonderful mini-vacation and enjoyed our time together. We did a similar trip last year and Kathie ended up in the ER with a urinary tract infection the caused her blood pressure to drop very low. This year I enjoyed the fact that she is cared for in a smaller facility and I was confident in her care for the three days I would be away from her. I work to balance our lives and this was a good time of respite for everyone. Monday morning after our return home, Kathie had two doctors appointments and Tuesday she was fitted for a wheelchair (we started the wheelchair process in September). I requested and was granted a referral for Kathie to see an Ear, Nose and Throat Doctor (ENT) to handle the closing of her throat stoma (opening) leftover from her tracheostomy; we have an appointment in early April for evaluation. I am also pursuing a dental appointment for Kathie's loose tooth. By Tuesday afternoon, I was pleased with the progress in Kathie's care, so often no progress is evident to me. My parents visited Kathie on Sunday morning and as my Dad was talking to Kathie, he moved from one side of her wheelchair to another, she followed him with her eyes. We continue to wonder what she sees and hears but find a blessing in moments like this.
"Ask God to keep the eyes of your spirit open to the risen Christ, and it will be impossible for drudgery to discourage you."
Dave
FEBRUARY 27, 2010
Last Saturday morning, I arrived early to see Kathie; a staff member looked surprised but a CNA named Carmen said with a smile, "love doesn't know what time it is." Kathie and I had a good morning together. On Tuesday, an outing was planned for the Balboa Park Museums and I went with the group. I met Kathie and the bus at the Automotive Museum, a family friend volunteers there so he welcomed the group as they made their way around the displays. Last year a new display was unveiled about the old Plank Road between El Centro CA and Yuma AZ. My Grandfather was interviewed and recorded explaining about the wood road over the sand dunes and how my Great-grandfather had run a "stage service" between these two points. Last Thanksgiving my brothers were in town so we all took Grandpa and his great-grandchildren to the museum to listen to his interview. When I called told him that Kathie had now been able to hear the interview he was very happy.
On this type of trip, I learn to care for Kathie outside of the care facility. Pushing the wheelchair around sidewalk holes and up ramps, I really appreciate the time with her. The rest of the day included lunch (where I gave Kath a taste of soda) the sports museum Hall of Champions and the Aerospace Museum. As the bus arrived to transport the group, I had that feeling of someone leaving on a flight from the airport. I stood very close to Kathie and then I gave her a kiss, she sighed and made an exhale noise. Carmen, who was near us said, "I saw that, she loves you too." Yesterday Carmen's daughter had cancer surgery on her throat. I remembered Rosa in my prayers for healing and Carmen for strength. I continue to appreciate that God reminds me to pray outside myself for the many friends who each have their own struggles.
This morning I was early to see Kathie again, as always, I kiss her and tell her, "I love you," but according to Carmen, she already knows how much I love her. Kathie was very comfortable and relaxed as I left our visit.
Blessings,
Dave
FEBRUARY 18, 2010
The Saturday before Valentine's Day, I took Kathie outside in the sunshine and gave her a pedicure, painting her toenails pink. I was glad to be outdoors with her as she wore her floppy hat and sunglasses. We continue to wait for the hole to close from the tracheostomy, the hole is closed each day using Steri-Stripes but the skin and cartilage have not come together yet. We have an appointment in March to meet with her doctor again. Occasionally, she yawns aloud, a sound I enjoy hearing. I also spent time with my arm around her, letting her know how much I love her and yet miss her.
I continue to grow frustrated with my role as a single parent, because I cannot provide the advantages of two parents nor do I have the energy to offer Madison and Hannah, my own inabilities frustrate me. I have gone back in my memory to Kathie's stories as a single parent and continue to pray for strength as I support the Girls. I have learned to pray for other single parents I know in empathy.
Since January, I have been reading and praying Psalm 42, I wonder what my role is for this life. Each project to keep Kathie comfortable seems to become mired in trivial forms and paperwork, my parenting is a struggle, and I am not sure what God wants of me. Psalm 42:9 "I say to God my Rock, Why have you forgotten me?"
Each night I still read Psalms or Streams in the Desert along with My Utmost, from Streams in the Desert February 17: "Dear troubled one, have you been waiting for God to work during long nights and weary days, fearing you have been forgotten? Lift up your head and begin praising Him right now for the deliverance that is on its way to you."
I thank you for your prayers; I recognize that when I want to whine about my life, I have many friends who pray for Kathie daily, our family and my strength. I try though to share honestly about my daily walk and continue to count on God’s renewing strength.
"Hope in God, for I shall yet praise Him, the help of my countenance and my God." Psalm 42:11
Blessings,
Dave
JANUARY 22, 2010
Two of my friends lost their wives to cancer in September, I have shared with them that the time between Halloween and New Years is a difficult emotional time and usually after New Year's Day, I breathe a sigh of relief, but this year the relief did not seem to come. The multiple projects with Kathie's, throat healing, wheelchair design and even a cable television request have all taking much longer than expected. I enjoyed the months of coaching girls' soccer but there are "costs" associated with this wonderful task. Our home repairs and remodeling are in the fourth month and the day-to-day tasks of single parenting have brought me down to an uncomfortable place of waiting and the feeling that I am not catching the tasks that fall through the cracks.
As Hannah's soccer season ended in the last two weeks, I returned to more consistency in my jogging routine. At the top of a small hill on my route is a traffic sign that states, "No Stopping Anytime." I smiled as I read it, I found a traffic sign that speaks to my daily grind and gives me direction. Last week, Madison, Hannah and I sat down to a meal at our dining room table, an event that has become unique rather than the norm. Madison described that dinner to my Mother with such excitement. I will need to refocus my efforts in this area.
Saturday I trimmed and painted Kathie's toenails, when the staff sees this they are reminded that I care about each detail of Kathie and they look closely. We watched her new television, including football games, while holding hands. Sometimes, I stroke her hair, telling her how pretty she is and how much she is missed. This month I purchased some new wrist and elbow braces to go with her knee brace. These braces help loosen contractures and increase joint flexibility. I also continue to work on her mouth muscles trying to help her relearn mouth breathing. Each Monday or Tuesday morning, a massage therapist continues to give her an hour massage, I do not visit that day because she sleeps very soundly afterwards.
Lamentations 3:24-26 NIV I say to myself, "The LORD is my portion; therefore I will wait for him." The LORD is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him; it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the LORD.
I am glad the Lord is my portion; I will continue to wait for His direction,
Dave
JANUARY 8, 2010
Nehemiah 8:10 ...The joy of God is your strength!
After the rush to set up our Christmas Tree, we had a very nice Holiday. Andy spent Christmas Eve at our house and organized the Christmas Brunch when the rest of our family arrived, including omelets made to order.
Madison was very happy for the opportunity to sleep in during the school break. It was very odd for me to watch her drive off to the mall and shop for presents on her own.
Hannah is also one who enjoys sleeping in during her break. Her soccer all-star team participated in a tournament the weekend before Christmas and she has been enjoying her teammates.
I have been coaching Hannah's all-star team and likewise enjoy coaching the young ladies. Between shopping, construction and coaching there were many busy days leading up to Christmas. We continued our "Choose Joy" theme this year by consciously reminding ourselves of the reason for the Holiday. I visited Coronado Hospital before New Years to touch base with staff and patients that we have come to know. When Kathie moved out, I donated some of her old gowns to the Hospital, the young woman who was moved into Kathie's old bed was wearing one of the gowns when I visited, a reminder of disabled friends that spent another Christmas in the hospital. Another woman in her 20's who we befriended was photographed smiling, sounds strange but an amazing blessing to see.
The mall trip with Kathie is still my highlight for December,
Dave
Hi Dave
ReplyDeleteSo glad you've got this blog site. We keep up with the old site, but are glad we can post again. Know you, Kathie and your precious family continue to be lifted up in prayer by the Sheedys.
Hi Dave, Once again, your tireless love for Kathie brings tears to my eyes and reminds me to love! Thank-you for living the marriage vows! I'm glad to read about your girls going all these years to work at the mission in Tiajuana -- I keep saying I need to get my older kids involved in some service work along those lines too. I'm going to "just do it" very soon --- this summer for sure. It will be so neat to see how this situation with their dear mother and the way you've lived for Christ will make them into young women in a few short years! God has a plan, and for our perseverance let us pray! God Bless you my friend, Laura near Philadelphia
ReplyDelete